Excerpts from the Story of "Queen Zahra" "Tell me where it hurts the most—so I may love you there ... more... and more?" Written by NinarEskila

  Excerpts from the Story of "Queen Zahra"

"Tell me where it hurts the most—so I may love you there ... more... and more?"

Written by the writer and author NinarEskila

Excerpt Eight

In his words, she found unparalleled knowledge, ethics, and wisdom. He spoke to her about his country and his people, and she listened to him with deep astonishment. Besides his knowledge and skill in his work, he was courageous, strong, and loyal—an embodiment of manhood and moral beauty, which only deepened her admiration and attachment to him.

However, what truly pained her was his rejection. Throughout her life, she had never witnessed such love, tenderness, and passion in every detail of his relationship with his beloved. She continued to wonder about the sources of his wisdom and knowledge, and was told that it came from heaven.

When she visited him and conversed with him, she tried to lure him into looking at her, hoping that he might see something in her beyond her beauty. She longed for him to find something in her that was more than what was apparent on the surface. But her soul was cold, rigid—everything about her was distant. Anyone who saw her would almost certainly conclude that she was heartless and emotionless, as nothing about her seemed to indicate that life stirred within her spirit. She had never known love, affection, or the closeness of anyone. Her life had been as dry as the desert. Her mother had died giving birth to her, and the maid who raised her was preoccupied with making money. She had found no one to treat her with love.

Excerpt Nine

The matter of the heavens consumed her thoughts and took up all her time, as she tried to find a way to reach the sky, hoping to draw closer to its inhabitants and bring something back to her lover. She ordered her assistants and collaborators to build a tower for her to reach the heavens. They immediately began constructing a tower that would rise above the clouds, with many peoples contributing to its construction, decorating it with gemstones, gold, and corals.

Excerpt Ten

When her tyranny and arrogance became widespread on earth, along with the seduction she provoked by diverting everyone’s attention to herself, captivating all the men and causing harm to all the women, the inhabitants of the heavens took note of her actions. They expressed their rejection of the injustice she was committing and the turmoil Queen Zahra was sowing in the hearts of the people.

Excerpt Eleven

Two angels sought permission to descend to earth to end this era in which women had withered and men were humbled, leaving them insignificant, and to prevent humanity from extinction due to men’s refusal to marry. The two angels were granted permission to descend after desire was placed within them. When they arrived at the queen’s palace and requested to see her, she allowed them entry. Upon seeing them, she was astounded by their beauty and exquisite appearance. She had never seen a beauty that words could not describe, a beauty that left tongues tied. 

Their faces were like the full moon on a clear night, their hair as black as the night itself, their bodies built strong and imposing, radiating such power that if they struck the earth, it would tremble beneath their feet. She admired them and was captivated by their presence. They told her that they were angels sent by heaven, bearing her knowledge and news of her people. They began describing things she had never heard before, speaking to her of matters beyond the grasp of her senses, and she listened intently, having never heard such things.

Excerpt Twelve

 When she realized that these two angels were the solution to her long-held desires, and that through them she could achieve what she had always sought, the angels, seeing her fascination with their words and her deep desire to be near them, asked her to allow them to be with her and marry one of them. She refused, for how could she accept when she held no regard for any man on earth, her heart already belonging to the one man who had touched her soul?

However, when they insisted, she relented, but on one condition: they must commit a sin. Knowing they were angels and that angels do not sin, she sought to subdue them with her demands. She gave them a choice: to drink wine, kill a child (her husband's son, the emperor's heir, thus denying him the right to inherit his father's throne), or commit adultery. They refused her requests—how could they kill, commit adultery, or drink wine, when they do not defy God or approach sin? But under her relentless insistence, they agreed to drink the wine. When they did, they lost their senses and acted without awareness, carrying out every request she made, including killing and committing adultery.

Excerpt thirteen

The angels told her that if she wanted to ascend to the sky, there were words she had to speak, keys to the speech that would open the path. Driven by the intense desire that possessed her, she took the words, memorized them, and began to repeat them. She found herself in a world that seemed almost like fiction, a realm so beyond her imagination that she couldn't begin to describe its beauty. She wandered through it, seeing what fulfilled the yearning that had burned in her for years, hoping to meet her lover. She embraced the beauty she had envisioned to its fullest, and the uniqueness that had reached its highest peak.

When she had satisfied her longing but could not find her lover or any means to bring him back to her, she decided to return to her palace. Perhaps the angels could help her and provide her with what she lacked. But as she prepared to return to the earth, her amazement caused her to forget the words the angels had taught her. She became trapped there, unable to leave, and the fire of her love became eternal, radiating across both worlds. Her presence faded from the earth after her long absence, and the curse lifted. People regained their minds that had been taken from them; their consciousness returned, and they were filled with wonder. How had they all gathered in one place, despite their different languages, origins, ancestries, and lands, as if they had no will or decision of their own?

Excerpt fourteen

Everything that happened in Zahra's life seemed to prepare for the birth of a goddess. All the suffering and pain she experienced, or those she encountered, were nothing but signs of what was to come. Zahra still shines in our skies today, and she has been burning for thousands of years, reminding us of that suffering. She became a symbol of beauty and a goddess of all that cannot be described or appreciated. However, she realized too late that the great and unique thing she had spent her life searching for and longing for was nothing but love. Its greatness surpassed everything else, and the emptiness that filled her soul and heart was simply the need for this emotion. Everything she had gained did not satisfy her need for a loving heart. She built a tower and sacrificed a kingdom, souls, and fortunes for her love.